It’s been another busy week at Casa Flavour. We’ve been rushed off our slippers, shooing pigeons from the patio and racing through Duolingo until we learn the Spanish words for “do you sell facemasks?” All this lockdown excitement certainly fuels the appetite, so we’ve been cooking more meals than the internet cooks up coronavirus conspiracy theories. Here’s a spicy little number, home-made with amateurish equipment, using improvised ingredients procured from a mediocre local supermarket. Enjoy our chicken curry recipe below:
1.5 surprisingly massive onions
5 garlic cloves, chunky enough to make Dracula soil his cape
A piece of ginger the size of E.T’s finger
As many fresh chillies as you can handle
350ml of delicious tomato passata
3 tsp curry powder
1 tsp paprika powder (well, we think it’s paprika)
1 tsp ground black pepper
3 tbsp natural yoghurt (or Kefir, if you still haven’t figured out how to buy unsweetened yogurt locally)
Handful of fresh coriander (unless you’re a hater)
2 chicken breasts, taken from a Spanish chicken that was so muscular it could’ve been a contestant on Love Island
Olive oil for cooking, or something more appropriate
Basmati rice to serve
Drink Margaritas with Mr Flavour because it’s Tuesday. Bicker over whose turn it is to cook. Concede it’s yours and wonder if you’re sober enough to pull this off. If concerned, have another few sips to build your confidence.
Dice the onions using a knife that’s seen more action than Chuck Norris, because the rest are in storage. Brown in a deep pan on a medium-high heat. Peel and finely chop the garlic and ginger. Chop the chillies, making sure you wash your hands in time with Staying Alive, Thong Song or Down with the sickness by Disturbed afterwards. Add garlic, ginger and chillies to the pot and cook for 2 minutes.
Add the curry powder, black pepper and paprika. Stir frantically because it looks like a disaster. Don’t worry, it’s perfectly normal. Add the sliced chicken, turning until the toned, muscular flesh is spicy and bronzed.
Add the passata, bringing the heat to a gentle simmer, so that it doesn’t erupt like tangy volcano, causing you to lose your rental deposit. Add the yoghurt and simmer for approx. 25 minutes to ensure the chicken is cooked.
To serve, spoon an excessive amount over basmati rice and sprinkle with coriander for that restaurant-quality effect. Be sure to put it on Insta before you shovel it down. Place your precious toilet roll in the fridge, ready for tomorrow morning.
Stay safe, happy and well fed, Flavour fans.